I’m in my 21st or so (not going to figure out exactly) hour of fasting for Yom Kippur. For those unfamiliar with it, it’s a full day fast that begins before nightfall the eve of Yom Kippur, the night of Kol Nidre. We have a final day of introspection and atonement. In the tradition, it is also a conversation time with G-d before the Book of Life is sealed. Fasting is a big part of the observation, and I always dread it prior to, but in the moment of it I understand. It’s not until about the 20th hour that it starts to sink in, i.e. when it starts to feel difficult.
There is a survival rule of thumb – the rule of threes – which anyone trained in Wilderness medicine or rescue will know. It’s not quite literal, but helpful to remember: three minutes without air, three hours without shelter (from cold/exposure), three days without water, three weeks without food. A Yom Kippur fast does not approach these limits, but it is at this moment that I can imagine the confusion and desperation someone who has had no food or water for a few days more is going through, the cumulative effect of a weakening system. In terms of Yom Kippur, it is meant to keep the focus of the day on prayer. But I think it is also meant to remind of how frail and fleeting life is – and our returning to eat at the end of the fast is a returning to life, as well as normal life (work, school, etc). By this time in the fast, many people have varying degrees of tiredness, headaches, and general lethargy. We are past general “hangriness” as some of my friends call cranky hunger. We can no longer work terribly effectively, even if we want to. As a kid this was always a time for homework, which was difficult with my mind straying a lot. I remember things like rereading the same paragraph several times, or restarting a math problem after getting clearly wrong answers. In short, it was frustrating to not be functioning as expected, much like anytime it is frustrating for one to be sick with a cold or an injury. It still is, but I have come to accept that as part of the fast, and I know it ends quite soon after I start to eat again.
In good health and times of success, we don’t remember this feeling of being on the brink that easily. Of course, we are in a challenging economic time and more people are scaling back on luxury and even basic needs as we contend with depressed job markets, foreclosures, and loss of retirement savings. Fasting today is an interesting parallel to the refocusing for many going on at the societal level, and of the difficult choices many are having to make to maintain food or shelter.
Yom Kippur comes along without any relation to whether it be a good time or not for someone, let alone a society, and any Jewish adult who is physically able to (it won’t endanger their life) must observe the fast.
I am thankful for this, I think it is a necessary space to be in once a year, a humbling moment. In this one day fast, it helps me remember that I am never more than the rule of three away from potentially life threatening times, and that without these basics higher production is difficult. It is an opportunity to remember that on a day to day basis, how fortunate I have been to not know this feeling. And it is symbolic that as my individual fast ends, a meal together with others begins.